Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, How To, Thoughts, Writings

How To Stay Away From Negativity

I was showing a person a video about a DIY home project. It was pretty easy, doable, cheap, and we have most of the materials on hand. I was pretty excited. Then that person made a comment, “Of course it turned out good, they used ‘that’!”. I was stunned at how shallow that person’s mind was. How negative! ‘That’ thing was a tiny little thing compare to the whole idea. We could do the project even without ‘that’.

That comment is a negative highlight of that person’s personality. Or… An inferiority. Either way, it’s negative. A negative person will always try to find anything to talk themselves out of something. They will find themselves incapable of doing anything they don’t want (avoid) to do.

Here are some of the things I do to avoid myself from negativity:

  1. Turn an obstacle into a challenge. Whenever I find myself trapped in a difficult situation, I challenge myself to get out of there. I can be very persistent. I will try to turn things around in my head, make a plan (most of the time, I don’t even have any plan), take action. That’s why I do a lot of ‘first’. I will go with my guts and all I have, to make myself out of difficulties. It’s not a matter of a good brain, it’s a matter of willingness. I’m a strong believer that anything can be learned, as long as you have the willingness to learn.
  2. Don’t set NO as a default answer. I have a hard time saying no as an answer. I know sometimes it will disadvantage me, but it’s necessary when I need something to work out. I had my first job at a bank coz I said YES. I had my first job as a Sales & Marketing coz I said YES. Then it led me to my first job at a 5* hotel coz I said YES. I had my first job as a Secretary coz I said YES. I had my first client as a Virtual Assistant coz I said YES. I did my first website designing coz I said YES. I did my first writing contribution coz I said YES. I had a lot of ‘first’, as I mentioned. I don’t let my limitations determine my destiny.
  3. Achievement recognition. It is okay to tell your story. It is okay to recognize your achievements. It is okay to share your success. As long as you’re using it to boost your confident, not to put others down. You need to remind yourself that you CAN do it. Never talk yourself down. There’s nothing you can not do. You have been doing great and you will do more greatness.
  4. Shut up! If you can’t say any good things, you better shut your mouth. What’s worst in negativity other than to hurt others by your words? Being critical is important, but being nice is crucial. You can’t get any positive outcome from a negative mouth. An adult controls their mouth.
  5. Turn off bad news. Watch what you bring into your mind. Stay away from bad news. This world is already broken, you can’t fix it and make the world a better place if you yourself is broken. Heal yourself then heal others. Read motivational books, listen to sermons (if you’re a religion person), watch inspirational movies, find success stories, etc. Bring in positivism to your mind so you will have positive outcome.
  6. Don’t assume. Stop being such a mind reader. You don’t know everything. You don’t know someone’s story. You don’t live their life. When someone want to visit you, don’t assume that they wanted something from you. Maybe they just want to connect. When some family offer you an opportunity, don’t assume that they’re trying to step on your ego. You would’ve missed your lifetime success if you reject the offer over some pride. When some friends ask you to dinner, don’t assume that they just want you to take the bill. Maybe they just want to hang out with you, to know you better, to be your friend, so your not so lonely.
  7. Set reasonable goals. Goals are important. You can’t live your life like a mindless zombie. Waking up in the morning not knowing what to do coz you don’t have a goal. You need to set a purpose, make a plan. What are the things you’re trying to achieve? Nothing is impossible, yet you need to be reasonable. Once you set your goals too high, when you don’t get the result you wanted, you can get discouraged, and it will set you down. If it’s reasonable, most likely you will success. You will have more confident to set another goal. Do it slowly, take baby steps, learn as much as you can.
  8. Let go! People can hurt us. People can cheat on us. People can be evil. It’s not something you can fix. It’s not your job to punish them. It’s useless to dwell on it. If you keep carrying the pain, it will burden your steps, you will be walking limbs, take you slower to your destination. Your mind will start taking unnecessary precautions. Stopping you from moving forward, too afraid you’ll get hurt again, always see the bad side of everybody. All you can do is learn from it, let go, move forward.
  9. You’re not God. You’re imperfect. You have flaws. Take it easy with your mind. Don’t let it go wild. Always see the brighter side of everything. Start taking notes of your gratitude. Don’t praise yourself too high that you can’t see other’s goodness.
  10. God owns everything. No matter what you have or don’t have, it all belongs to God. God can give you everything, yet He can take everything. Stay humble. Keep honoring God.

I see negative people live in such a tiring life. Always burden their mind with ‘what if’. Taking unnecessary precautions. Giving unimportant comments. Sabotaging their mind. Take off all of your pride, learn from others, listens, and I promise you will have a peaceful life.

 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Parenting, Thoughts, Writings

Turning Point

I’m not in a state to tell you don’t and do thingy. It’s just something I do and think on how to turn my life from having the victim mentality into someone who wanted to put a stop to a disadvantage in life. 

I used to be someone who looked at everything at its worst and I dwell on it, thinking heavily about it, stressing over it, being a paranoid, afraid of being hurt, and I stayed in that point for a very long time. 

I used to be someone who made a mistake and thinking that it was my turning point. That I destined to be like that. That it was my fate. Live in the mistake. There’s no point in fixing me. I was already broken. 

I was in the victim mentality. 

Then I got older, wiser, and I see clearer. I put a stop to it. All those victim things didn’t make me a better person. Instead, I was living a life that’s full of negativity and ungratefulness. Everything seemed to be setting me up as a victim with zero chance of winning. 

I put a stop at my bad habits. I put a stop at my stubbornness. I put a stop at my cockiness. I humble myself to learn from others. I try to keep doing my best even if I don’t get recognized. I control myself. I’m adulting every single day. 

Yes, I do sometimes disappointed by the lack of recognition of all the hard work I do. I got anxious when I’m not being noticed. I got upset when I feel that I’m alone in this. I feel that I’m empty in this fullness. 

Yes, I got overwhelmed by all the mess in my life. Trying to do everything in my limitations. Fighting for everything that needed to be fixed in this jungle of uncertainty. Facing my biggest enemy yet a huge deal to face with. 

Trying to be understood by not sending the wrong message of war. Keeping the peace is always the hardest thing to do. I’m always standing on a thin ice who could’ve break at a tiny single move. 

All of those things are jumbling inside my head. My heart gets easily broken. I’m fixing myself at every moment of my life. I want to be better. I refuse to be someone who I hated so much. I’m not gonna get comfortable to my disadvantages. I’m not gonna be a victim. I will work hard to achieve what I deserve. I’m not giving up to laziness. Certainly not surrendering to any addictions, who would eat me alive and make me a useless person. 

I’m gonna be the role model for my children. They’ll know how to live their life at their best. Honoring God and receiving their blessings. 

How you start is not important. How you finish is all that matters. 

It is not how live in the past. It’s how you live in the present.

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

Am I poor?

We were Bible reading one night and I told my kids that we should be always grateful for whatever we have now. 

I mentioned everything we have. Health, house, car, TVs (we have more than 1 TV), fridge, electric drum, keyboard, etc. I usually ask them to say 10 things they’re grateful for that day. 

It’s not as easy as it seems to mention 10 things everyday. Especially when you have a routine days. Nothing’s special to remember. Everyday just doing the same things make us ‘numb’. 

It’ll be easy when they’re at school. They usually mentioned about the teacher, friends, exam results, homework, or any other school related. But when it come to summer, no school day for more than 2 months, they lost words. 

At first, they mentioned about being able to play games everyday. It’s special for them, coz on school days, they can only play on weekends. But then they get tired of mentioning the same thing over and over again. 

One night, Al was mentioning his gratitude… “I am grateful for our house. We have a big house. But my fridge is empty”. 

I was a bit sad that he could think that way. After we all mentioned our gratitude, I talk to them about Al’s gratitude. I asked him, the reason he said like that. Even though it is not a figure of speech. We literally have no food in the fridge. Still, I need to know what’s in my son’s little brain yet not small minded at all. 

He asked me back, “Are we poor mom?”. Hmmm 🤔 Are we? If I open the fridge, I could say we have not enough money to fill the fridge with weeks of food and snacks. But because of that, can I say that we’re poor? 

I don’t post a vacation nor a fancy eating out on social media, coz we don’t have enough money to vacationing nor eating out in a fancy restaurant. I don’t post any expensive gifts to our friends or family. Can I say that we’re poor? 

I’m a stay at home mom that has her planner full of cleaning schedule and organization home projects. Nothing’s fancy about that. I post frugal lifestyle, frugal haul, frugal diy, and everything else frugally. Can I say that we’re poor? 

Well… I’m a frugal in nature. But life had us stuck in a non frugal lifestyle. Thinking that eating out everyday was A Okay. Thinking that buying expensive gifts was a must in order to satisfied that person. Thinking that living frugally is the same as poor, and you’ll feel ashamed of people knowing​ that you’re poor. 

Being poor is a curse. When you’re poor, you’ll have no friends. No family will want to hang out with you. Then you’ll start living a lie. Hoping that if you’re not frugal, people would think that you’re not poor. You start living the life of a ‘rich’ people. 

Can I say that we’re poor? 

Well… I don’t really care what you think. I don’t live for you. I don’t ask free money from you. I will find another friend that will support me even if I’m ‘poor’. If you think that me living frugally means​ that I’m poor. Then you can say that I’m poor. And if you don’t wanna hangout​ with poor people like me, I’m A Okay with that 👌 

We bring our own food, we don’t eat out expensive way, we thrift, we (sometimes) don’t have food in the fridge, we don’t stock up on snacks, we save gas, we stay at home most of the summer. Can I say that we’re poor? 

No! We are the children of God. God Almighty, who controls the universe, who provides, who anointed us with poor proof. I am never be poor. My God provides, each day, without fail. 

“Give us this day, our daily bread”. THIS DAY. OUR DAILY BREAD. Jesus teach us to be humble. To be grateful for what you have TODAY. Coz tomorrow has its own trouble. 

Live in the moment. Live in a grateful lifestyle, when being poor is not​ your destiny that God has settled for you. 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

No Shame!

My Bible journaling is not perfect. I skipped days. As you can see, it’s been almost a month since my last journal. 

I started late and I skip days. I should’ve been ashamed to show you this, coz it’s showing my imperfections, my flaws. As most people do in social media, I should just posting good images and perfect performances of my life. 

But life is way near perfect. We have mistakes, flaws, bad days, rough times, and other awful things. Life is not about us dragged along those things, weighing our journey, walking limbs, thinking that it’s too late. 

No! Life is a matter of us getting back on track, leaving the mistakes behind, learn to be better, seek for a way that’ll bring us to our destination. It’s never too late! 

Your flaws shouldn’t stop you from what God has been destined you for. As long as you put down your pride, on your knees, asking for God’s wisdom, letting God be your potter and shape you. 

Your ego won’t save you from shame, it only covers the flaws and piles them till you can’t even see your true self. Blocking your path. It’s okay to have flaws, making mistakes, having imperfections. 

Know that you’re anointed, start again, move forward! 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, Writings

Hope in a distant 

It’s blooming 😍 I took them from my friend’s, half dead. She wasn’t sure about me taking them coz she thought I was just moving her trash to my house. I took it anyway. 

I water it every morning and for a while, I thought she might be right. They seemed pretty dead, they’re drying out on me, leaves were falling. But I keep watering them and see… They’re there 😍 

They’ll be the 1st flowers in my house. In fact, in my life. I’ve never had the chance to do some gardening. Maybe that’s why I was pretty stubborn on taking them with me. 

Can we be stubborn enough doing things that seemed useless yet important to us? Are we patience enough waiting for our prayers to be answered while trying, for God knows when to stop? Do we have that faith to stay faithful in the process? Can we still have our hope high when it’s far in a distant? 

I know for sure, process could be painful and teary 😥 But I know for sure, if we stay faithful, do what’s right, flowers would start blooming 😍 

God works in the root, out of sight, out of mind, but beautiful flowers sure brightened our lives, at His time 🙏

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, Writings

Radiate 

The light of the phone radiates my face in this dark room. Headsets plugged into my ears. Closes the door to a conversation. Kinda my style lately or I should say, me being a jerk. At least this few months. 

Can’t help it. Can’t hide it no more. I’m irritated, more and more every single damn day. I kinda feel sick to my stomach that I am able to be this gloomy lady, shaping dark shadows everywhere I go, circling back to the place I was before. The place I wanted to leave like ever. 

This is not what I had in mind. My picture perfect is not perfect at all. It has flaws. And I’m okay with flaws. As long as you don’t make that on purpose. Isn’t it silly that one would ever purposely making a flaw and make others so anxious to the point of fury? Like pushing them away to the edge of patience over love. 

Come on… 

God created us in such ways for us to be able to survive. To change in our survival. Change can really helps you keep up in the game. Don’t sabotage yourself and limit your ability to do anything. Everything. 

Get up! Do something! Make a change! Survive! 

God blesses people who works on their path of life. Praying without trying is like dictating God to do what YOU want. Of course He could do anything to anyone without any prays or any tries. He is God! But He is not a father without teaching the children how to do life. Do not challenge Him for He is God. Challenge yourself to pray and try harder when you haven’t received any kind of miracles. Coz your time is coming! 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

Impression Of A Broken World

Manchester to Jakarta.

Tragedy.

At any number of victims, a kid lost their parent, a mother lost their children, a couple lost their spouse, people are losing. Who’s winning?

Is it supposed to be a game?

A challenge we often found on net?

A bomb tag?

What is wrong with this world?

Too many broken people taking revenge for their broken life. On whose account?

Do humanity still exist?

Are we still human?

I feel sick!

We are excessively revealing ourselves and exposing our vulnerability, easily taken by fake intentions.

Our pureness are no longer simulated by gratefulness.

Do we ever recognized ourselves among these chaotic world full of shattered souls wondering around with troubled intellectuals? Who are we?

We should go back to our core of life. The essence of living. The wisdom of love. The greatest among all greatness. Who are we?

We take such a presumption on how majestic we are. Who are we?

Recognizing oneself and experiencing spiritual form of love is essential.

Find the true love of ALL love and you will discover the purpose of your existence.

Should others take responsibilities for our fragmented self?

I feel sick!

 

 

 

 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Day In The Life, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

38

Today is the day I turn 38.

38 years of ups and downs.

38 years of good and bad.

38 years of routines.

38 years of God working on me. 

God is the potter and I am His clay.

For 38 years, God spins me over and over and over. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed. I want to get out of the wheel. I feel that I’m spinning without seeing any changes. Sometimes I questioned God. He knows what I’m going through. Moving in circles. Instead of getting any good changes, I feel dizzy and lightheaded. It happens when I got my vertigo. The world is spinning, but I don’t get to go anywhere, couldn’t even stand up without throwing up. 

What is happening? Why am I not chosen to be blessed? Am I not worthed? I bombarded Him with my unsatisfactory questions. 

For 38 years, I am hot and cold. Worshipping God for His greatness. Other times I blame Him. There are times I faithfully went to church. Other times, I stayed home on Sundays, thinking that it’s pointless, going to church. 

In 38 years of my life, I am what I am. God doesn’t change one situation, not because He doesn’t want to, but because He’s changing me. To prepare me for what’s coming. To mold me to fit into the blessing He has prepared for me. 

In 38 years of my life, I have become a responsible mother. Doing all these motherhood routines. Checking off my to do list. Working my ass off. Unnoticed for now. But my boys are taking in my routines, seeing what I’m doing in their life, in front of their eyes. Molding them to be a responsible man. 

In 38 years of my life, I am normal. Normally follows what I thought was the right ways. Normal to swipe the credit card to get what I want. Normal to spend unwisely. Normal to be financially irresponsible. But I learned that I was following the wrong examples. I am now seeing people being responsible with their money. Not that they don’t have the money to spend, but their being responsible. 

I’m mature enough to decide what I want to see. They have money, but they go back home after errands to have their lunch instead of eating out. They have money, but they thrift shopping. They have money, but they don’t go to the theater every week. They have money, but they’re​ budgeting and stick to it. They have money, but they don’t treat their children like the owner of the world. 

In 38 years of my life, I am the clay of God’s pottery. I’m gonna trust Him to make me be what He has planned for me to be. I will be faithfully stay in my spinning wheel. Preparing myself for what’s coming. Thanking Him all the way. 

I was blessed before. I am blessed now. I will be blessed. I will be faithful in my routines for another 38 years and more. I don’t work under people. I work under Almighty God. 

Happy 38th to me! 🎂 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Parenting, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

It’s official!!! 

Congratulations boy!!! 

I’m so proud of you 👍 You’ve worked so hard. I see you growing, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. You are no longer a baby, well… You’re always be my baby 😍 

But I’m learning life with you. You’ve taught me so much more that I could ever teach you. This motherhood thing, will be such a hardship without you. 

Now, you’re entering another level of life, another new beginning, another life lessons. I want you to know that you’ll never walk alone. I promise to be yours in your happy times, exciting moments, puppy love state of puberty, sad times, disappoinments. 

We will never know what’s ahead of us. But I assure you, that God is already prepared the best blessings for you now, in the future, and will always be. I’m gonna help you through it. To achieve it. 

Keep honoring God. Be grateful. Thank God what you have and what’s coming. Be a lamb of God. He’ll take you to the great destiny already prepared for you. 

Stay true to your heart. Be genuine. Be kind. Honest. Be you. 

Shine my son! Give light to wherever you are. Lend a hand to whoever needs it. Let everyone see that God lives in you. 

Shine my son! 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Thoughts, Writings

Acceleration

12 years of renting houses. Move from town to town, looking for a better future. 12 years of praying. 12 years of ups and downs. 

Didn’t see it coming, suddenly we’re looking at properties, had no money in hand, had no idea how much was our budget. Looking at small properties, to the smallest, to postponing, to hunt again, coming back and forth. 

In a month, God provided us a land 5x larger than our previous apartment. Cash. 

We’re expected to find another rented house, smaller than the previous, cheaper. 

Now, a month before our rented house overdued, we already moved to our OWN house. 12 years turn into 1 month miracle. 

We’re now having our downs again, I know it’s for our own fault. But my faith is going to be my accelerant, turning our years of downs into a flash time of miracle. 

It’s easy to get stuck in the negatives, sabotaging our blessings, for all the failures happening in our lives. This is when our faith is supposed to be carried to the highest way possible, coz God has already sending our answered prayers, and it’s up to us, to accelerate it or to tied them up. 

Stay in faith, keep thanking God for what we have and what’s coming, keep the positive attitude, live in expentacy, speaking word of faith & victory. 

The day will come that your head will swim and everywhere you look, blessings! 🙏