Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, Writings

RadiateΒ 

The light of the phone radiates my face in this dark room. Headsets plugged into my ears. Closes the door to a conversation. Kinda my style lately or I should say, me being a jerk. At least this few months. 

Can’t help it. Can’t hide it no more. I’m irritated, more and more every single damn day. I kinda feel sick to my stomach that I am able to be this gloomy lady, shaping dark shadows everywhere I go, circling back to the place I was before. The place I wanted to leave like ever. 

This is not what I had in mind. My picture perfect is not perfect at all. It has flaws. And I’m okay with flaws. As long as you don’t make that on purpose. Isn’t it silly that one would ever purposely making a flaw and make others so anxious to the point of fury? Like pushing them away to the edge of patience over love. 

Come on… 

God created us in such ways for us to be able to survive. To change in our survival. Change can really helps you keep up in the game. Don’t sabotage yourself and limit your ability to do anything. Everything. 

Get up! Do something! Make a change! Survive! 

God blesses people who works on their path of life. Praying without trying is like dictating God to do what YOU want. Of course He could do anything to anyone without any prays or any tries. He is God! But He is not a father without teaching the children how to do life. Do not challenge Him for He is God. Challenge yourself to pray and try harder when you haven’t received any kind of miracles. Coz your time is coming! 

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Posted in Thoughts, Writings

Pure Hate!

I hate you!

Hate when you do nothing to be something.

Hate when you’re lost not knowing what to do.

Hate when you had a brain blocked like a complete idiot.

Hate when you can’t get up and work.

Hate when you’re so stubbornly cocky. 

Hate when you do nothing but highly praise yourself. 

Hate when you think it’s all thanks to you.

Hate when you self proclaim.

Hate when you’re sleep all day when everybody is trying to make a living.

Hate when you think everybody is your slave.

I hate you!

Yes you!

You are the core of every troubled soul in this world.

I don’t ever want you in my life! Ever! 

I’m more than happy to let you go.

Damn you laziness!!! 

Damn you! I hate you! 

Posted in Hacks, How To, Organization, What I Do

Home Organization – Coat Corner – Launch Pad

Hi…

Welcome back! 😘

Please hit the ‘follow’ button if you haven’t already 😘

I want to show you my new arrangement on the coats. We have a launch pad at the entryway. I will have a different post on that. 

It’s behind our front door. It’s out of the way, hidden, yet easy to access. 

I bought a cheap plastic hooks. Broken in weeks 😰 I had 5 hooks, to 4, to 3, to 2, to 1, to no hooks and I had to hung the coats in the shoes closet handle 😨 

So hubby, was working on something and tadaaaaa… We have a coat corner πŸ‘

He’s using kitchen rod and S hangers used to hang pans and pots in our old apartment 😁 

The S hangers are really handy. I can take it out and hook it again, depends on how many coats we have that week. 

Reuse and repurpose πŸ‘Œ No money spent πŸ‘ 

Do you have something to organize? Shop your house πŸ˜‰ 

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Daily Prompt, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

Impression Of A Broken World

Manchester to Jakarta.

Tragedy.

At any number of victims, a kid lost their parent, a mother lost their children, a couple lost their spouse, people are losing. Who’s winning?

Is it supposed to be a game?

A challenge we often found on net?

A bomb tag?

What is wrong with this world?

Too many broken people taking revenge for their broken life. On whose account?

Do humanity still exist?

Are we still human?

I feel sick!

We are excessively revealing ourselves and exposing our vulnerability, easily taken by fake intentions.

Our pureness are no longer simulated by gratefulness.

Do we ever recognized ourselves among these chaotic world full of shattered souls wondering around with troubled intellectuals?Β Who are we?

WeΒ should go back to our core of life. The essence of living. The wisdom of love. The greatest among all greatness. Who are we?

We take such a presumption on how majestic we are. Who are we?

Recognizing oneself and experiencing spiritual form of love is essential.

Find the true love of ALL love and you will discover the purpose of your existence.

Should others take responsibilities for our fragmented self?

I feel sick!

 

 

 

 

Posted in Hacks, How To, Organization, What happened?, What I Do

Graduation Series – Book Cleaning & PurgeΒ 

Abe is now going to Primary School, so he definitely doesn’t need those books and papers anymore. 

It’s time to clean up and purge. Come along with me πŸ€“ 

I’m gonna check on notebooks that can be reuse, books that are going to be handed down to Al, some crafts to keep in the kid’s memorabilia box, and books to donate.

The chaos…

These are the books to keep for Al.

These are the Abe’s tests from grade 4-6.

I’m gonna keep it for Al. I put it in a bag so it won’t get dusty.

These are the notebooks.

I sure not buying anymore notebooks. I’m gonna buy some plastic cover for it and the kids are gonna reuse it. I cut all the written pages, so it’s clean to reuse. 

Donating these. I’m gonna give some preschool and kindergarten books to my niece.

These are the clean pages I cut from books.

I’m gonna use it for my binders or clip them for the kid’s notes. Certainly not wasting anything πŸ‘

These are trash.

The end product.

For now, I’m gonna leave it like that. Waiting for Al to finish his final exams, so I can get to a thorough cleaning up. 

That’s it for now. I will come back with the next cleaning and purging Al’s books. And will definitely take you to join my back to school preparation. 

Please hit the ‘follow’ button so you don’t miss all the fun 😍 

Posted in Adulting, Thoughts, Writings

Thankful

Been asking myself what’s the difference between views and visitors. Now I know πŸ€“ I’m still a student in WordPress blogging class 😁 

It’s a good feeling to know that people are visiting my blog and views some of my posts. Sometimes when we read something, the 1st page is kinda do the justice, it’s the page when you decide whether to read more or pass. I know that those numbers are tiny for you, but being recognized, knowing that people spend their precious time to read your blog, is HUGE for me. 

I am so grateful that God gives me this blessing to bless others. To share what has been going on in my life, in my thoughts, in my existence. To let them know, that they’re not alone. I am maybe not as good as you, and you make me an example to not be like me, to encourage you to do better. Or maybe I am someone that has the same situation with you, and you make me a friend to make you feel that actually you’re not alone in this mess. Or maybe you hate my writings and that make you laugh… At me 😁 Well… The least, I make you laugh right πŸ˜‚ Or maybe I make you feel better, blessed, grateful, for the life you have. 

I could be anything for you. Good or bad. I’m happy that I am someone, for you πŸ˜ƒ 

Thank you 😘

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Day In The Life, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

38

Today is the day I turn 38.

38 years of ups and downs.

38 years of good and bad.

38 years of routines.

38 years of God working on me. 

God is the potter and I am His clay.

For 38 years, God spins me over and over and over. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed. I want to get out of the wheel. I feel that I’m spinning without seeing any changes. Sometimes I questioned God. He knows what I’m going through. Moving in circles. Instead of getting any good changes, I feel dizzy and lightheaded. It happens when I got my vertigo. The world is spinning, but I don’t get to go anywhere, couldn’t even stand up without throwing up. 

What is happening? Why am I not chosen to be blessed? Am I not worthed? I bombarded Him with my unsatisfactory questions. 

For 38 years, I am hot and cold. Worshipping God for His greatness. Other times I blame Him. There are times I faithfully went to church. Other times, I stayed home on Sundays, thinking that it’s pointless, going to church. 

In 38 years of my life, I am what I am. God doesn’t change one situation, not because He doesn’t want to, but because He’s changing me. To prepare me for what’s coming. To mold me to fit into the blessing He has prepared for me. 

In 38 years of my life, I have become a responsible mother. Doing all these motherhood routines. Checking off my to do list. Working my ass off. Unnoticed for now. But my boys are taking in my routines, seeing what I’m doing in their life, in front of their eyes. Molding them to be a responsible man. 

In 38 years of my life, I am normal. Normally follows what I thought was the right ways. Normal to swipe the credit card to get what I want. Normal to spend unwisely. Normal to be financially irresponsible. But I learned that I was following the wrong examples. I am now seeing people being responsible with their money. Not that they don’t have the money to spend, but their being responsible. 

I’m mature enough to decide what I want to see. They have money, but they go back home after errands to have their lunch instead of eating out. They have money, but they thrift shopping. They have money, but they don’t go to the theater every week. They have money, but they’re​ budgeting and stick to it. They have money, but they don’t treat their children like the owner of the world. 

In 38 years of my life, I am the clay of God’s pottery. I’m gonna trust Him to make me be what He has planned for me to be. I will be faithfully stay in my spinning wheel. Preparing myself for what’s coming. Thanking Him all the way. 

I was blessed before. I am blessed now. I will be blessed. I will be faithful in my routines for another 38 years and more. I don’t work under people. I work under Almighty God. 

Happy 38th to me! πŸŽ‚ 

Posted in Day In The Life, What happened?, What I Do

DITL #22 May 2017 – Off to Jakarta

Monday, 22 May 2017

9.38am just got on the bus. On the way to Kelapa Gading. Waited for an hour 😰 It’s my 1st bus ride after 3 years πŸ˜€ 

11.41am arrived at Artha Gading Mall, straight to SAMSAT to take care of my MIO’s tax. Gosh… It was a bad traffic 😭 I have headache, just took my pain killer πŸ€•

Queueing 😰

2.22pm on the bus, back home. Thanks Lord, I just have to wait 20 minutes for the bus πŸ˜‡ 

3.35pm arrived at school. Waiting for Abe. 

4.20pm change of plan. Took me 20 minutes to went home by foot 😁 Reached home, toilet, grab the car keys, off to church. Hubby will pickup Abe πŸ‘Œ

4.50pm arrived at church for Al’s keyboard class.

1st keyboard class. I unofficially join the class 😁. May God bless us with keyboard so we can practice at home πŸ™ 

9.18pm on the bed. Exhausted 😰 Need to recharge so tomorrow I can have energy to play catch up. Sunday and Monday, no housework. A lot of catching up tomorrow πŸ€”

Posted in Parenting, Thoughts, Week In The Life, What happened?, What I Do

WITL #20 – Graduation Exam (Ujian Negara) 2017

Sunday, 14 May 2017

11.49pm the kids are on bed. I’m on my bed planning for the week. I even have full schedule on the boy’s music classes​ at church till end July. No school for the next 2 months, yet I have full schedule for music classes. Mom is always on the go 😁 

Had my nap after church. Lately I really need my power nap. I don’t feel much energy these few weeks. I feel terrible. Hubby is helping on the dishes. I’m so grateful. 

I did my load of towels and a load of laundry. Folding and ironed clothes. Then I had to help Abe preparing on his graduation exam. Tomorrow is the 1st day. We’ll be busy preparing till Saturday. 

After that, I have to help Al prepare his final exam. Like I said, mom is always busy 😌

Monday, 15 May 2017

UN (graduation exam) day 1 – Bahasa Indonesia. 

1.54pm Abe was having problems at tutor, said that he couldn’t concentrate on Math (tomorrow’s exam). I asked him about what happened. He said, I still have Bahasa Indonesia exams in my head 😰 

I told him, what’s past is passed. Let go… Coz we no longer in control to that. What’s need the attention is what’s coming next. 

I prayed for him and now he’s napping. Hopefully, he got up fresh and ready to tackle Math πŸ™ 

Now let’s tackle mine… Housework 😁 But 1st… 

It’s so hot so I’m making ice coffee and it’s my 3rd cups of coffee today, at 2.04pm 😎 

7.55pm I’m in my room doing my blogging and planning while Abe is busy with his math.

I’m clueless in this subject, but at least I’m presence for him πŸ˜„

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

UN (graduation exam) day 2 – Math

3.51pm I’m on the go. Having this energy and keep moving. Done all of my daily cleaning routines then move on to my cleaning schedule, cleaning the top of the fridge

Look at that 😨 Can you see the difference? I have this in my cleaning schedule but I keep procrastinating coz who would’ve seen right? You have to be tall like really tall to be able to see the top of the fridge. But since I’m on the mood, I did it and feel soooooooo satisfied πŸ˜… 

8.07pm I didn’t get to do the rest of my list coz we got company. So it has to wait till tomorrow. Now, I have to help Abe with his science πŸ‘Œ

Wednesday, 17 May 2017

UN (graduation exam) day 3 – IPA (Science)

3.45pm the boys are napping. I just finished cooking, kinda late coz I got VA works to do. Doing my 2nd load of laundry. The 1st load was 2 blankets and 1 ironing cover. Now it’s a load of clothes. I still have lots to do before Abe start studying for tomorrow’s exam.

I still have tons to do and feel so tired, wonder why πŸ€” Yesterday I could’ve done all, rather than delaying it again, while I’m​ the mood, you know… Well, things happen. Now I don’t feel like doing them πŸ˜₯ 

8.55pm I finally get to scrub my bathroom. I can finally check it off my list that’s been days writing them over and over again 😰 It’s unlike I delayed it for months, it’s only days, but when it’s in my schedule, I can’t just let it go. I know I shouldn’t burden myself like that, but yeah… It’s just me and my brain 😌

I’m here in my room helping Abe for test tomorrow. He did PKN at tutor, now he’s preparing Christian, while as usual I’m doing my planner and blogging 😁

Thursday, 18 May 2017

8.31pm and I’m closing my eyes 😴 Nooooooo!!! I need to stay awake, Abe is still studying for tomorrow’s exam 😰 

I’m so tired 😰 

I still skip some. Oh hell… I’m skipping πŸ‘Œ It’s good to have your to do list, but don’t be its slave. Listen to your body. If it’s screaming asking you to stop working, then you stop. Those things will be there tomorrow, and the next day, and the next, and the next. Take it easy. Give yourself permissions to have some slack 😎 

Friday, 19 May 2017

3.19pm I finally get the heart on brushing these wheels… 

Really you guys… These wheels are messing with my floor. They’ll get dirty very easily and those sticky dirts are transferring to the entire house, coz the boys are swirling the chairs around, all over the house 😰 

7.17pm I score today! πŸ€— By this hour, I finished 90% off my to do list. The house is clean and picked up, the kitchen is clean, boys are on bed, and I need my reward 😁

Which one should I see 1st πŸ€” M. Night Shyamalan’s movies are always intriguing. Maybe I should go with Split 1st πŸ€“ 

Saturday, 20 May 2017

My boy is officially a teen πŸ‘πŸ‘πŸ‘

Today is his last exam. The very last! The last day of elementary school πŸ‘ 

3.30pm we’ve finished changing all the bed sheets, now I’m moving on to my cleaning schedule. 

Today is washing curtains of the kid’s and Oma’s room. While it’s running, I get to clean the rods, the vents, and the walls. What’s your cleaning schedule? It’s good in keeping tracks and making cleaning schedules, so we know that our house is regularly cleaned and not worrying about the kid’s inhaling dusty air in the house. 

Health is expensive and it breaks my heart when the children gets health issues. Having cleaning schedule eases my mind. Though I’m not so tough on myself. 1-2 days delay wouldn’t do any harm πŸ˜‰ Just enjoy your motherhood coz we wouldn’t know when we stop doing it. Live the moment πŸ˜„

Posted in Adulting, Christianity, Parenting, Thoughts, What happened?, Writings

It’s official!!!Β 

Congratulations boy!!! 

I’m so proud of you πŸ‘ You’ve worked so hard. I see you growing, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. You are no longer a baby, well… You’re always be my baby 😍 

But I’m learning life with you. You’ve taught me so much more that I could ever teach you. This motherhood thing, will be such a hardship without you. 

Now, you’re entering another level of life, another new beginning, another life lessons. I want you to know that you’ll never walk alone. I promise to be yours in your happy times, exciting moments, puppy love state of puberty, sad times, disappoinments. 

We will never know what’s ahead of us. But I assure you, that God is already prepared the best blessings for you now, in the future, and will always be. I’m gonna help you through it. To achieve it. 

Keep honoring God. Be grateful. Thank God what you have and what’s coming. Be a lamb of God. He’ll take you to the great destiny already prepared for you. 

Stay true to your heart. Be genuine. Be kind. Honest. Be you. 

Shine my son! Give light to wherever you are. Lend a hand to whoever needs it. Let everyone see that God lives in you. 

Shine my son!